söndag 30 december 2012

Popes eat babies

One of the Papal Papillons

Anti-Catholic articles have been coming out almost daily in the Guardian over the past couple of weeks. It is no longer news that the Nazi Pope, having personally and single-handedly invented Zyklon B in his school chemistry laboratory, tested it in sadistic experiments on the biology department's guinea pigs, and then perfected the final solution on his school friends' pets by exterminating them in his father's garden shed, nor that he is a notorious queer basher who will go to any lengths to cover-up paeodo-priests.

Iceberg of Evil
But queer-bashing and covering up is only the tip of the Iceberg of Evil that is the Vatican. The Inquisition is still going full-steam-ahead. Popes and the Roman Cardinals eat babies. It is one of the perks of the job. They are served on feast days and every day throughout Lent, when ordinary Catholics are expected to fast. Regarded as a great delicacy, they have to be under ten days old, when they are sweetest and juiciest. Roasted babies are prepared by the top Vatican chefs, who are sworn to secrecy not to divulge their special recipes handed down from the Middle Ages. Their creations are brought to the table on solid gold salvers. The reigning Pope gets to eat a whole baby every Friday (the bones and chewy bits are made into soup and what is left over after that is fed to the Papal pack of Papillons). At the same time the gullible faithful (what other kind are there?) are forced to make do with pea soup and dry bread as part of their Friday penance. It can only be a matter of time before this dark secret is revealed.

This also explains why the Catholic church is so against abortion. The Popes and Cardinals have to secure their supply of babies for their feasting.

WARNING: ironic

Inga kommentarer:

UK productivity questions

The latest UK productivity figures for the first three months of 2018 are not good, prompting the usual recriminatory comments. However, the...